It's an unfortunate fact that the more you fancy the person that you are talking to, the bigger the fool that you are likely to make of yourself. An interesting physiological reaction takes place that may result in one or more of the following:
- Sweaty palms
- Sweaty head (worse, as it is harder to disguise!)
- Blanking of the mind
- Loss of cohesive conversational skills
- Disappearance of your sense of humour
- Appearance of stammering or other body tics
- Loss of bowel control (in extreme cases only)
There is no known cure for this condition. However, it can be controlled with beta blockers, alcohol* or advanced mental techniques. If you pretend that you don't like the person (i.e. reduce the desirability factor), you can correspondingly reduce the idiot factor (see graph above).
The corollary to this rule is experienced when you meet someone you don't fancy in the slightest. You can get on like a house on fire as you are relaxed and can be yourself. However, this can lead to the problem of unwanted attention. It's a jungle out there for the singleton!
*There is a fine balance here. Too much alcohol results in much the same symptoms!
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