Belly top suitability

Oh the joys of seeing a belly top adorning the torso of a flat stomached gal. Top it off with a nice tan and/or a belly button piercing and you have one of the finest sights in nature! In fact, if I was David Attenborough, I'd consider doing a series on it!

However, wearing one is fraught with danger as it's a thin line between alluring and disgusting. It's never nice to see a person wedged into an outfit that clearly does not suit their physique. This is especially true with the belly top where even the slightest excess around the midriff is ruthlessly exposed. You could say that ambition is being confused with capability or that there is an absence of close friends to take the offender aside. You have to be cruel to be kind sometimes and this is a prime example of where much embarrassment could be saved with a quiet word.

Surely one of the worst sights in bird watching (of the non-feathered variety) is the so called "muffin top", where the excess blubber spills out over the skirt/trousers like a muffin over its casing. The graph above shows how the chances of looking good in a belly top decreases with every excess pound that you carry.

Best left to the genetically blessed or the super fit, me thinks, just like bicycle shorts on a man! As I like to say "If you got it, flaunt it; if you don't, don't"!!